Morning Pages 52214

It's so easy to fall back into your old habits. I was going to pick up something quick for dinner last night, but instead I came home and fixed something to go with the chicken I had. It wasn't a long drawn out task and I felt better about doing that. I find myself at a stand still. I have so much to do and yet I'm procrastinating again. It's not getting done. Okay let me rephrase that. I have so much to do in the apartment. I am still working on cleaning it. I realize and have always known that you can't give your children advise if you are not right. So I really have to get my act in order. My prayers are going up constantly and I have seen blessings coming down. I have a cluttered kitchen, bedrooms, and sewing room. The bathroom is the only room that's not cluttered. I told my son William that he had to de-clutter his house and then his life would get better. He's stressed out to the max, and that bothers me but I can't help him. He really doesn't want my help. So I pray and ask God to make help me change me, so I can show my children and hopefully it will help them change themselves. I had a dream about Penn and there were other people in my dream that I knew. Other family members as well as friends. In my dream I was very intimate with Penn or maybe that wasn't me at all. As I laid in bed this morning I heard myself breathing, but my breathe was like an echo. It startled me a bit. I cleared my throat and then it went away. Another busy day; funeral and then quilting with the seniors. I haven't done any quilting for myself since last Tuesday. I have to straighten the fabrics in my sewing room so I can get back on track. I ask God to help me plan my day. I ask Him to order it the way it should be. I pray that what I'm doing today is pleasing to Him. I have to continue to Let Go and Let God take care of me. I have to Let Go and Let God direct me. I have to TRUST in Him! I've seen his blessings and miracles and I have to Let Go and know that He will never Let me down! This is the day that the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it. Thank you Lord for all that You have done for me!