Late Morning Pages 21614

As I lay in bed I'm thinking about so many things to write about. Then I get up and I'm a blank. So much runs through my head. I have so much to express and then nothing. Yesterday we celebrated WP2's birthday. It was a nice gathering. I enjoyed watching the kids have fun. I met with one of my son's and his girlfriend after the party. We went out for a late dinner. I needed that. I got a chance to talk  to him. He's still not letting me completely in. I know he's feeling some sort of way, but I know this too will pass. I am praying that my entire family will release the scars that we have and move on. We have to let go, especial me and move on. It's interesting how we carry so much hurt and never let it go. How do we get rid of it. I have to approach my outlook differently when it comes to dealing with my mother and my sister. I allow my self to become reactive instead of proactive. This is going to take a lot of prayer and meditation. I'm so nosey and I have to stop worrying about my family and take care of me. My arm was aching me yesterday. I think it was from the shoveling the day before. I have to try to get on top of things when the snow is falling. I have to change my physical, mental, and spiritual being. I do thank God each and everyday for the gift of life but now I have to show God that I do thank Him. Until tomorrow . . .